An ongoing dialogue on HIV/AIDS, infectious diseases,
August 25th, 2019
Save the Dates! International Scientific Conferences You Can’t Miss
So many options.
See, they really want me. And how do I know that my participation will be so important?
Just look how personalized the greetings are — clearly intended for me and me alone. I’ve included actual screen shots of the invitations as evidence for the careful thought that went into sending me — yes, me — these invitations.
To say I’m flattered barely begins to describe how these emails make me feel.
First up, from an “Auston Matthews”, who describes himself (herself?) as “Program Manager”:
Dear Mr./Ms. Matthews,
I’m very well indeed! And how are you? How are you enjoying the role of Program Manager?
Now that we’re done with the niceties, let me assure you — the privilege and honour are 100% mine. Being a Speaker towards the 3rd Global Experts Meeting on Infectious Diseases would be something special. I’ll highlight it on my CV in bright yellow marker. Please relay that (plus my best wishes) to the Organizing Committee Members, who no doubt are busy in London planning an exciting meeting.
Before I make my flight arrangements, where is “Bankok”? Is that near Bangkok?
With warm regards,
Dr. PE Paul E
Next — an email from a certain “Henry Walter, Conference Manager”, who generously offers me the chance to visit Rome!
Academic medicine, what a global endeavor!
Dear Henry Walter,
May I assume we both can communicate on a first-name basis, since you used mine? Hope that’s not too presumptuous!
And you bet I’ll participate in that conference! Not only were the first three iterations of the International Conference on Neurology and Brain Disorders (INBC) scintillating, but I’ve heard that the 4th — INBC 2020 — will absolutely rock.
Let’s speak ASAP about my topic, as I have some ideas. How about a lecture entitled, “Degenerative Brain Diseases of Fish”? After all, I’m the expert.
Hope this sounds INBC-worthy to you. I know the standards are very high!
On to invitation number three, which represents the very pinnacle of personalized conference invitations. It comes from a “Dr. Irene Frank”, whose title is “Executive Director, Coalesce Research Group”. They’re based in Greenville, South Carolina, in case you were wondering.
Here’s what I wrote back:
Dear Dr. Frank,
First, very warm wishes back to you! Speaking of, it must be hot this time of year down in South Carolina, ha ha.
Second — Plenary Speaker at Nano 2019, what an honor! I’m speechless. But don’t worry, I’ll get over it by November, and will be ready to go for my plenary talk. I’ll make sure it’s something BIG about this small (nano, get it?) topic. Ha ha again.
Third — just curious, is it hard to organize a conference in Osaka all the way from Greenville, South Carolina? Is there a direct flight? It’s amazing how you folks at Coalesce Research do all that you do, so impressive.
Finally, before formally agreeing to speak, I have to ask — how will you be introducing me? It’s just not clear from your invitation. And I confess — sometimes I feel like a nowhere man, sitting in a nowhere land, making all these nowhere plans, for nobody.
Take it away, guys.